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Ja sam Tatjana Toškov, hronični gastritičar, teški emotivac i pasionirani šmirglač verbalnih oštrih uglova, uz primenu humora.

Rođena sam 06.03.1971. u Beogradu i bila sam jedina plava beba sa crnom dugom kosom u bolnici tog dana. Prvih 30 godina je proletelo u seljakanju vamo-tamo na relaciji Zrenjanin - Majdanpek, školovanju, radu na Radio Televiziji Majdanpek, potom i na Radio Zrenjaninu, a onda je vreme usporilo. Jedan za drugim, porazboljevali su se i poumirali, meni na rukama, ljudi koji su mi bili najbliži, posle čega sam - kao što bi i svaki dobri mazohista uradio - završila obuku za negu starih i bolesnih lica, kako bih se profesionalno bavila time.

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Moglo bi se reći da se toliko toga, mog i tuđeg, nakupilo u meni, da sam postala bolno svesna potrebe za oduškom. Moja ćerka je, u to vreme, pohađala školu crtanja, koja je bila otvorena i za roditelje. Prihvatila sam poziv, svesna da nemam nikakvog talenta, već samo iz želje da proboravim malo u nekom drugom svetu. Jedna divna devojka nas je posadila i uvela u elementarne likovne pojmove, postavila ćup i skrenula nam posebno pažnju na senke...i tu sam potpuno odlepila. Nikada ih nisam bila potpuno svesna, ne na takav način. Pa, kad sam ih sagledala i osetila, počela sam da crtam k'o luda.

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Moja ćerka je posle par meseci odustala, a ja ostala...sve dok vremenom nije počelo polako da mi postaje jasno, da meni to nije dovoljno. Ono što je nedostajalo, je bilo ono po šta sam i krenula - isceljujući odušak. Ništa od onog čega sam bila puna, nije izlazilo, nisam se oslobađala, bilo mi je lepo, uživala sam u crtanju i klizila sam u bolesti. Tada, ni ranije ni kasnije, saznala sam za Art Brut Srbiju, Gorana Stojčetovića i dubinski crtež, preko prijatelja Marjana Đarmatija. Pogledala sam fb stranicu grupe i to je bilo to. Ti ljudi su iznosili, vadili, čupali, prelivali, isijavali sve iz sebe, bez pardona i predrasuda...milina jedna. I sada sam tu. Tegobe su takođe i dalje tu, jer to nije nikakva čarolija, to je proces koji zahteva vreme i rad, ali zato sve polako postaje jasnije i lakše. Mnogo lakše.

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Kontakt:

https://www.facebook.com/tatjana.toshkov

 

-----ENGLISH-----

 

I am Tatjana Toškov, a chronic gastritis sufferer, a heavy emotional person and a passionate sander of verbal sharp corners, with the use of humor.

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I was born on March 6, 1971. in Belgrade and I was the only blond baby with long black hair in the hospital that day. The first 30 years flew by going back and forth on the route Zrenjanin - Majdanpek, studying, working at Radio Television Majdanpek, then at Radio Zrenjanin, and then time slowed down. One after the other, the people who were closest to me fell ill and died, in my arms, after which - as any good masochist would do - I completed training in caring for the elderly and sick, in order to do it professionally.

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It could be said that so much, mine and other's, accumulated in me, that I became painfully aware of the need to vent. At that time, my daughter was attending a drawing school, which was also open to parents. I accepted the invitation, aware that I have no talent, but only out of a desire to spend a little time in another world. A wonderful girl sat us down and introduced us to elementary art concepts, set up a jar and paid special attention to the shadows... and that's when I was completely blown away. I was never fully aware of them, not in that way. Well, when I saw and felt them, I started drawing like crazy.

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My daughter gave up after a couple of months, and I stayed... until over time it slowly started to become clear to me that it wasn't enough for me. What was missing was what I was going for - a healing vent. None of what I was full of was coming out, I wasn't freeing myself, it was nice for me, I enjoyed drawing and I slipped into illness. Then, neither sooner nor later, I found out about Art Brut Serbia, Goran Stojčetović and depth drawing, through my friend Marjan Đarmati. I looked at the association's fb page and that was it. Those people brought out, took out, plucked, poured over, radiated everything from themselves, without forgiveness or prejudice. And now I'm here. The problems are also still there, because it's not magic, it's a process that requires time and work, but that's why everything slowly becomes clearer and easier. Much easier.

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Contact:

https://www.facebook.com/tatjana.toshkov